Ready to become the master of your emotions — around women? And stay ICY (meaning totally in control of your emotions) no matter what happens?
Yes? Good man 😉
You’re about to uncover the 4 keys to hold your frame on a date (or ANYWHERE else). But first, let me share an EPIC bonus secret with you, for staying icy and maintaining your frame no matter what happens.
Here’s the million dollar secret: when a girl tests you or life challenges you, if you don’t show any discomfort or change in your facial expression nor your body language, your brain literally wont register that there’s anything wrong.
The stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius said it best, “Choose not to be harmed and you won’t feel harmed. Don’t feel harmed, and you haven’t been.”
As an extension of this idea, by choosing not to react externally (by not changing your facial expressions and your body language), your inner world too will remain untouched.
By keeping your shoulders back, continuing to wear a smirk, and maintaining the same posture as before you faced this new test, challenge, or obstacle, your brain gets the memo, “He’s not showing any discomfort on the outside, so why would I think there’s a problem here?”
By not showing any discomfort on the outside, and by choosing not to be harmed by the outside world, your inner world follows suit. Staying non-reactive on the outside trains your mindset and your emotions to remain stable, icy, and in-control.
This one’s a game changer.
Especially when you uncover these upcoming four keys for staying icy, and in-control, of your emotions no matter where you are or what happens to you. If you’re ready to stay “stone cold” and in-control on dates, in the boardroom, before giving big speeches, and everywhere else, then let’s move this thing forward…
If you’d rather uncover these four keys for staying icy on a date (or anywhere else) by watching a video, then press play here:
And now, let’s continue onto key number one…
#1: Create and Repeat a Mantra
Just this last Monday, I received a message from a former client. We’d had a successful track record together, but I hadn’t talked to him in months, so his message was unexpected.
He told me, “Hey Jason. I need your help. But I have two more presentations in the next two days. I notice my voice would shake during the run-through. Are there any techniques you use to stop this from happening? I tried eating halls candy to no avail. Help! Thank you.”
We jumped on a call that night. I told him to throw out halls candy. Instead, I shared with him these four keys we’re diving into in this article. First thing we discussed? Creating a short, effective mantra for him. The mantra we came up with? “Deliver the message.”
Deliver the message, Deliver the message, Deliver the message. He repeated this mantra countless times before giving his two speeches. In a minute, you’ll see how it all worked out for him.
But first, let’s get back to YOU. What’s the area you’re most looking for that icy non-reactiveness? Is it on dates? Before making sales calls? Before speeches? Or somewhere else?
The goal is to create a short and sweet mantra that’ll remind you of the mission on hand — so that your mind gets focused. Repeating a great mantra before a big date, interview, speech, or sales call gets your head right. So that you can unlock the result you desire.
Here are some examples…
For guys who want a mantra for approaching woman, I recommend, “If she’s stunning, I’m gunning.” (Meaning, if she’s sexy, I’m going to say something!)
If you’re trying to master your frame and stay icy on a date, consider repeating the mantra, “Just keep it chill,” to yourself. Before continuing, take a minute and commit to a short and sweet mantra you can repeat to yourself whenever you feel like you’re on the verge of losing your emotional frame.
Or, if you want me to help you create a mantra so you can get next level results, check this out.
And now, let’s continue…
#2: Know Your Worth (10+ reasons why exercise)
When you know either what you can offer, who you are, or what you’re selling HAS VALUE, you’ll feel far more confident. Your frame will be stronger. Your emotions will remain more stable.
The secret to internalizing your worth is to perform a “10+ Reasons Why Exercise,” where you simply write down all the reasons either you, your skills, your speech, or the product you’re selling are valuable.
For example, if you’re about to go on a date, take some time and write down EVERY SINGLE REASON why you’re a man of value — someone the girl would be lucky to keep dating. Or, if you’re going to start making sales calls, write down ALL the reasons why your product or service is of tremendous value.
This exercise puts your focus into the realm of helping others — serving their needs and wants. In turn, completing this exercise should calm your nerves and lower your anxiety significantly. Especially when you pair this with everything you’ve already learned (and are about to learn)…
#3: Loop Your Favorite Song Through Your Head
Looping your favorite song through your head is a massive hack that’ll help you stay icy when it matters most. Personally, I learned this one back in college, when I started *awkwardly* approaching women each day between classes.
Perhaps you know that I used to be super anxious — girls didn’t dig me at all. My knees would shake and my frame would crumble as soon as I’d try and look the woman in the eye. Yes — my confidence was super low.
Side note: since I know what it’s like to have no confidence, I can help you get way more confident really quickly. So, if you want more confidence with women, definitely check out this free training:
GET REAL CONFIDENCE WITH WOMEN THIS WEEK
After months of struggling to get any dating results, largely due to my palm-sweating anxiety, I finally had an idea — to start looping my favorite songs in my head. I started being my own “personal DJ.”
The song I first used — to repeatedly loop in my head before approaching — was Low Rider by War. A classic that always got me in a good head space.
Sure enough, once I began looping this song over and over before approaching, my nerves started disappearing. My confidence started rising. And I was able to stay in control of myself more easily when I approached women on campus.
For the first time ever, I start feeling “icy.”
You can use this same mental hack to stay more icy in the moments that matter most to you! Right now, think of the #1 song that most puts you in an AWESOME MOOD each time you listen to it.
Did you pick a song?
Now, your job is to play that song — over and over again — in your head over the next few days. At the grocery store, in the gym, on the metro, and everywhere in between — play that song in your head.
When you do this, you’ll notice that song gets deeply imbedded into both your memory and most importantly — your sub-conscious. At this point, you’ll notice you feel more “comfortable in your own skin” on a regular basis.
What’s more? You’ll easily be able to loop that song in your head whenever you feel you’re getting a bit anxious. The second you feel you’re not as “icy” as you wish to be? Just loop your favorite song! It’s a game-changer.
#4: Practice and Repeat Your Craft Over and Over
It’s cliche. Yet, it’s true. Practice IS the mother of all skill. As much as everything you’ve learned this far will help you stay in control of your emotions and perform at the highest level — for your current level of experience — practicing and repeating your craft will make you that much better.
Here’s why: repeated practice gives you something invaluable: more experience and more skill.
If you want to stay icy on dates — no matter how many shit tests you get? Sure, you can read this and you’ll learn some wicked tricks that’ll definitely help. But ultimately, the #1 way to always stay icy on dates — regardless of what happens — is to go on so many dates that you’ve “seen it all.”
Or, let’s say you wanna master the art of speaking and presenting. Well then, sign up for Toastmasters (a club that let’s you practice giving presentations) and start giving speeches every week! It’s the same with interviewing, approaching women, making sales calls, or any other task you want to gain skill at — in order to dominate.
The more practice and repetitions you get in, the more experience you gain and the higher your skill-level becomes. And this makes all the difference.
Remember what Marcus Aurelius said. “Choose not to be harmed and you won’t feel harmed. Don’t feel harmed, and you haven’t been.”
Never forget that extending this idea — to how you carry yourself physically — literally trains your brain to stay calm, icy, and in-control. Combine this wisdom with the four keys you learned here and you’ll go far.
Remember my former client who had those two huge presentations? Who I shared these keys with? Even though it wasn’t easy for him, he did very well.
Here’s what he said, “Hey Jason-just giving you a heads up. Both days of my presentation went well! The first day I gagged in the bathroom (a) bit (but) felt better after. But yes, both days went well. Thank you again for your advice and support. Take care bud.”
He then wrote that he’s getting into Toastmasters, so he can reduce his fear of public speaking, stay icy calm when presenting, and deliver even better speeches in the future. (Sounds like he’s gonna put Key #4: Practice and Repeat Your Craft Over and Over, into play!).
As you can see, while these keys aren’t magic, they work. They’re the keys that get my clients real results. And they’ll get you results, too. So take action upon them.
Now, I want to hear from you. What’s been the most impactful takeaway you gained here today? Or, do you have a question? Something you’d like clarified? Share with me in the comments below. Let’s continue the conversation.
To your peak,
PS – Want a MASSIVE ADVANTAGE in attracting incredible women into your life?
REVEALED: The ONE Trait that Makes You Attractive
Imagine the most stunning girl, just standing there alone. “What should I say?” We’ve all been there. The real question becomes; what do you say to women when your mind goes blank? Here’s the truth…
When we were young, we were told to “get along with others.” Well, that advice is all fine and dandy. But only once you ALSO have the ability to say NO.
What can you do to radically improve your life? What I’ve found is that specifically as a man, the #1 change you’d should focus on making first is this…